"You're a real prick, Rolando."

NBC Miami – Perhaps the new airport body scanners are a bit too revealing. A TSA worker in Miami was arrested for aggravated battery after police say he attacked a colleague who’d made fun of his small genitalia after he walked through one of the new high-tech security scanners during a recent training session. Rolando Negrin, 44, was busted for assault after things got ugly at Miami International Airport between Negrin and some of his fellow Transportation Security Administration workers on Tuesday. Sources say Negrin stepped into the machine during the training session and became embarrassed and angry when a supervisor started cracking jokes about his manhood, made visible by the new machine. According to the police report, Negron confronted one of his co-workers in an employee parking lot, where he hit him with a police baton on the arm and back. Negrin then told victim to kneel down and say ‘your sorry,'” the report reads. “Victim stated he was in fear and complied. Negrin was arrested the next day when he arrived for work. He told police he had been made fun of by coworkers on a daily basis. Negrin stated he could not take the jokes anymore and lost his mind,” the report reads. Negrin was arrested and booked into Miami-Dade County Jail. The attack may be the first piece of proof that the new scanners may be leaving too little to the imagination. The $170,000 machines, which were introduced last year, took some heat from fliers who weren’t quite ready to show their bod to government employees. But if this latest incident is any indication, the scanners sound like good news for anti-terrorism and bad news for less-than-average men.

As the old saying goes, “He who smelt it, dealt it.” Wow… I’m so scared to get caught farting in public that when I smell something less than pleasing in a large group, the subway for example, I just stand and take it. Some people stand around using their shirts as make shift vent masks. Well, they are all the suspects. Mr. Negrin, just what were you thinking? You blew your cover man. I feel like since South Florida now knows you so well, we should be on a first name basis. Just when I think my life is at an all time low, people like you make me feel all warm and fuzzy again. Thank you Rolando Negrin, Miami’s Tiny Pecker Guy…

On a side note… If you think I’m going through that scanner with a chick working it, you’re on something. Maybe they should hire midgets to run them. I don’t know. Weird shit, either way..
~ Chef